✰☆★ Step In a rainny day ★☆✰

✰☆★ Step In a rainny day ★☆✰
wed 23/09/09 2:15

I'll seek you out,
Flay you alive
One more word and you won't survive
And I'm not scared of your stolen power
I see right through you any hour

I won't soothe your pain
I won't ease your strain
You'll be waiting in vain
I got nothing for you to gain


Am all alone.
Kinda boring too
I don't wanna make dreads right know.
Tired like hell. Can't sleep, because I have those weird dreams am making.
But this night i was dreaming of Alicia, she was next to me. I could feel her, touch her, kiss her.
And this stupid mind decide to wake up and i had a broken heart.
I want to scream. cry.

I woke up with a long face.
Drinking coffee, taking a cigarette.
Thinking. Spacing out.

Thinking what about going on a trip!?
Lets go to France! for 2 weeks? Maybe three? dunno.
How many money do I need? Where I can find it fast as I can!????
What do I need, when i will go?

I didn't finish knitting my scarf.
I always doing that. Start and unfinished a project.
Am lame. Tired.
its cold. its rainning.
I feel bitching someone.
*sigh*
caressing my kitty
falling asleep.


Chopin - Nocturne in E flat major, Opus 9 No.2 : muse
wanted to vanish like mist: mood
My cat love classic music and, he really enjoy chopin♥: commentary




# Posté le mercredi 23 septembre 2009 14:58

✰☆★ I found my reason to live ♥ ★☆✰

sunday 20/09/09 11:46

I can scream at loud I much I love you! Your always in and always be in my heart!
YOur the reason why I can go much further everyday, My force to quit anything.
Without you, I will be nothing
I LOVE YOU ALICIA♡♥

somehow love is a fluke

We've survived thick and thin
Taking knocks on the chin
All the words that you say
Through the night, through the day
Sometimes I think life crawls like a snail
And all of our dreams become the wind in your sails
You wind me up and I drive you mad
It's a fact of life, it goes hand in hand
And I know that look, it's read like a book
And I realize

I don't care what the world has to say
You should know that I love you
I love you
I love you today ♥


✰☆★ I found my reason to live ♥ ★☆✰

# Posté le lundi 21 septembre 2009 00:15

✰☆★There's people who suffering more then you ★☆✰

monday 14/09/09

Gently, my mind escapes into the relaxing
world of pleasure, a pleasure that'll take
my mind off the reality of my life,
my past life... life as I know it now.

And whatever may come, it slowly
disappears to somewhere in the back
of my mind. It will remain there,
until I wish to retrieve it.


★★☆☆☆★★

I never thought i will live in hell someday. I used to say << I know about misery and all>> but when am sitting alone, I can't stop thinking about it.
Do I hate the women who give me birth!? maybe...
I keep asking to myself << Why did you let me live if you hated me that much !?>>
This time we cross the line and treat us like animal and finally I got rejected by you because, you told me I was the one who got something wrong in my head. Did you know how much you hurt your own kid with those words? It was my fault if you didn't give me the right sex? Am still remember your words : your not my child.
I've been hurting so deeply I couldn't stop crying. I pack my bag and left home brutally.
At the end, all this wouldn't happen if you just sat and listen and for christ try to understand my feelings about it.
Am still not sorry for what happen, I wont apologies either. I must thank you, I experience life i couldn't imagine.

I changed city, called my friend Frank to ask him if i could crush tonight at his house. It was this same night I meet a guy named Thomas, he was 25 , working in construction,having two kids and he has in a divorce for a second time from his girlfriend who just give birth to a boy. He was depress and having trouble. He propose to live as roommate that I thought it was a great idea....HAHA noooooo WRONG ... I past the worst time in my life... if i knew...

I was stupid, my mom and yours always told us never talk to strangers, this is equal with LIVE with strangers too.
fuck, I couldn't refuse its was that or i lived on the side road. So we're tight bends and start to be roommates.
Meanwhile having our home, we were like poor people. Having diner table , one sofa, one small tv with no cable, no internet , no phone except or cellphone. One bed and our clothes. Beside we were buying and making some delicious food.
The day past and i wasn't smiling anymore. Thomas hated see me like that so he always trying to cheer me up.
I couldn't hold in it anymore so i told everything to Tom about , how i was the biggest stupid person on earth for braking my relationship with my girlfriend Ali in doubt and such in a painful way. I was crying and that jerk was surprise that I was gay, he laugh at the end because he thought i will have sex with him with an other girl.
All I do is show my middle finger and say you can put this in your ass and twist it because I wouldn't have any.

Tom never touch me, he was my friend and I could count on him, i was lucky... maybe...
He begin to be my best buddy, I went everywhere he went, he was having fun and listen loud techno beat in his car while he was trailing in swamp.
I saw frank couple of times and I finally saw His two friends Valerie and Cindy.
Val was a hot gothic chick, she was doing tattoo and piercing (she take care of my lips piercing thanks to her)
Cindy was more a girl who like's to party every night and she loved to got to swingers clubs. Both have daughters.
The biggest mistake in my life it was been surrounded by drugged people and i fell for it.
I was the most the time drugged to erase painful memories at Val house, chilling.
And i did this most stupid thing ever, I try heroine. I was so nervous and I remember Frank telling me to relax this will make me fly and bring my smile back. Like a fucking imbecile I said yeah ok go on. Just to proof i was strong who obviously am not.
I ever cry that much, i didn't wanted anybody around me. I really did what an emo do, i went to a corner and I was alone.
This wasn't me at all! Maxu is not like that i told to myself, am joyful and full of happiness, there I am unhappy and on drug. I was realizing How much in shit I was. I could see my own death at the roadside and that was freaking me out. I stand up and i walk back in my empty home, how i did it? I don't fucking know, I don't even remeber if i toke the bus or I walked.
I closed the door in the room and i start screaming. I needed to get out and do something so what I did!? Nothing, when you enter in a dark side there's no way to escape.
So I stop make my pleasure by buying clothes, make-up, anything even food. All my money went on cigarette, hash, speed, MM, I and hero.

When i woke up a morning Tom was there sleeping next to me, God he was so freaking me out. I stand up quickly and change up. I went outside drinking a cup of coffee when i sit alone in the outside-stairs. I never thought once in my life i will talk to big guy in the sky. I was saying Do I need to pass through all this? Is this worth it? I don't want this kind of life, because i wanted to become somebody in this society.

I never believe about miracle, but i think jesus heard my complaint and he give my an other chance because i was really trying to got out from this hell.
I came back inside tom was awake saying good morning. I saw i missed a call on my cell and i was surprise to see he was from home. I call back and my little sister pick it up. I was so happy to hear her voice and for was the same. She was asking me how I was doing and I lied like a stupid. So she said right hold on dad want's to talk to you. He told me to come back, mom didn't mean what she said and she thought i was at mymi , or meli my best-friends and every time she was trying to reach me it was engaged. I lied that i was fine but you daddy knows when you are not happy just how your voice saying it. He said where I was and I told him. The conversation end it there.

I told him not to come because of mom. I was not ready and dad understand he said whenever he will be there.
I cry when i hang up. Happy, Tom was in shock to see me smile like that.
The most horrible thing is, after one month of roommates, I when out taking fresh air. It was hot and with this fantastic sun , when it was the time to come back I was in shock, nothing was left. I didn't' understand was going on, where was Thomas things, even my drugs disappeared. The stress i pass through was incredible, i got pain in my stomach , headaches.

I call my dad in middle of the night crying,my roommates abandoned me without a warning. MY DAD CAME!
Of freaking god i cannot thanks for everything. I came back at home and mom was seeing me with a happy smile and apologies so I did.
My dad was proud because i didn't sign my name in the contract for the apartment. So am free and he's in deep shit.
Did I have news from him? Nope and i don't want to. Why would I ?!

After a few days, I got the guts to tell how much I was sorry for Alicia. I don't blame her to hate me. She can spit and put he claws in me and make me bleed i won' mind. I deserve it and i will take the responsibility for my immature action.

She wrote me. I feel bad. She just can send it by e-mail. Why she will spend money on me!? I don't understand!
Gosh...
Its good to be back home ♥♡♥
Thanks DAD to give me this second chance <3

Dream Big(Stonebridge Club Mix)-Jazmine Sullivan: Muse
Tired, i can't sleep :mood
I Started school! I try to finish it this year, wish me best luck!:commentary
✰☆★There's people who suffering more then you ★☆✰

# Posté le mardi 15 septembre 2009 01:01

Modifié le lundi 12 octobre 2009 22:19

✰☆★When I'm with my bro....★☆✰

wed 4:32 a.m 1/04/09

Cause in this life
Things are much harder than in the afterworld
In this life
You're on your own
And if the elevator tries to bring you down
Go crazy - punch a higher floor
If you don't like the world you're living in
Take a look around you
At least you got friends


★☆Oy!☆★
Its first April everyone! Time to prank the one you love or ... Hate XD
I don't prank anybody this year because last year, i went to far. Mom was unhappy about it XD hahaha
I explain, I was watching the chanel TLC with my bro. Suddenly i get up and ask my bro if he wanted a sandwich triple meat in it?! He said: yeah ... with his stone voice.

I went to the kitchen and ask if he could help me. He came and get out the meat from the fridge for me. I toke the knife bread for cutting the bread. He went to the toilette right after opening the meat.
With an evil smile i toke the ketchup in the fridge and toke red food colorant so quickly I put some on my foot and on the knife too ,quickly I hide everything under the sink. My bro was getting out so a pitch the knife really hard on the floor I fell on the groundand I scream So loud saying FUCK all the time balacing my body front and back holding my foot tightly.

MY BRO WAS SO IN CHOC he was looking at me don't know what to do. I was holding my foot and screaming to get me quickly a towel , and he did.He was saying out loud: are you okay? What happen? He was so freaking out that he turn standing up holding his hair.I said: HO MY GOSH I CAN SEE MY BONE!! He pick up the phone and telling me he's was calling the 911.

With the towel, i wipe off the ketchup and food colorant and I get up like nothing, i give him the towel in his hand and I said: that's a good idea! I kiss on his cheek and went watch the Tv.
My bro came to me with the towel in his hand, He was looking at me like he just saw a alien in front of him. He look at my foot and said, you have nothing?
I said : Happy first April Stupidd ASS.

I get Punch on my arm so hard.
Hun?
Why my mom was grieve?
I just forgot the ketchup under the sink
It stay there all night XD

Ho... and humm. I couldn't felt my arm for a good hour XD So don't o this prank XD
Ho maybe... I should to do the prank just like in supernatural XD Put superglue on his beer XD
HAHAHAHAH I HO man I be dead XD
If i'm not doing article the second april its because i'm in the hospital ahahahahaha
I'm so an evil person niak niak

Anyway Be carefull, if you have a great prank share it with me! Maybe I could use it next year! XD

So yeah.. that's all
see ya xXx
Max-U

★★★★☆☆☆★★★★

Happy : Mood
Nights And Weekend-The Starting Line :Muse
In the bathroom.... Don't ask why... BECAUSE I'M SHITTING MAN: Where.

I'm joking XD You belive this aren't you! ... Aw come on stop lying! XD



✰☆★When I'm with my bro....★☆✰

# Posté le mercredi 01 avril 2009 04:46

Modifié le mercredi 01 avril 2009 05:20

When people swim into massiveblack hole

When people swim into massiveblack hole
Sunday the 29 march at 2:27 am


It's not your fault that you're always wrong
The weak ones are there to justify the strong
It's all relative to the size of your steeple
You can't see the forest for the trees
And you can't smell your own shit on your knees






✩☆OY!☆✩
Its a new day for Me, it was shinny and warm outside. Spring is already here and am shaking my hand to said goodbye to Mister winter until next time!When we talk about spring, its mean cleanning up the winter mess and the first thing i wanted to talk about its something bothering me.

Let's be clear about a specific subject : judging or misjudging!
It could be on Myspace- Vampire freaks- DO YOU LOOK GOOD- FACE BOOK - SKYROCK- Gonegothic- Tagged-Hi5 ect ect ect
I'm so tired to read article about Everyone says: <Ho no, i'm not judging , am not hypocrite>
Yeaaaaaahhhh..................*cought cought*............................Right =_=''
Everybody jugde sooner are later!Its not always in a bad way, I mean it can be in a good way too , my point its steel JUDGING no matter what! You think I'm crazy? Let's check it out!
Take a foot step back to see it in my way.

So, my duty is proove to you how your lying about yourself and make you realise how much your nonsense.
Let's see...
SOON OR LATER You will juge a person because...:

-He's older then you and you trash him , because you think he wanted your pussy, in fact its the opposite.
-Just because your an Emo guys, All girls come at you and dont really care about what you write but only here for your pictures.
-A girl/boy who likes you, but just because hes/shes to way much beauty for you you dash her.
- When someone ask you some money to eat, you refuse to give it some.
-when your shopping and salegirl greets you, you turn away even say: Hi
- Said something that you did like.
-Compliment someone!
- Hangout with your friend and talking about the hotest person in your class.
-someone putting his journal on the floor when there's a bac of recycle right next to him.
- Lesbian's or homo's kiss at each other.
- Searching someone who only have cars! (That's was the best shoot ever XD)

I can go on and on... hun? You wanted?

- When a person wear fashion clothes.
- when you listen your music
- When someone becoming to way popular, they change their attitude so it make you change you point of view from that person :D
- After talking to someone. you think if its a good or bad man or women.
- when your dance and a guy come closer at your back and repulse him even look at his eyes to see you wanted to have fun with you?
- When your at the movie and a gang always talking, you think their annoying and finally you step up and say to shut up already.
- Judge the movie. Its a review too and at lest it touch the judging! Shut up! XD
- somebody cooked for you and its not or its good!
-About haircut!
-When you don't like a style you treat that person who did nothing to you?
-Talk behind backs of people.
-When you pick your friends.
- Same goes for jobs EVEN You future CAreer Its that amazing!?

It could be anything! It always ending about judging or Misjudging soon or later.
So i'm sorry your are a bunch of liar who's not real.

I don't know why or when it been decided that judge its a bad thing. We live in a world and everyone look the same? Who wants to be true? Original? A person who's confident? Tell it!

SAY IT BELLA! SAY IT LOUD! < quote from Twilight XD>

ME- MAXU I Judge because i'm only the one who's NOT hypocrite and admit it!
If I believe all ou guys in your kinda wonderland thing, the world will be veryyyy annoying

SO I hope you understand My point of view, I enjoy and thank you for taking the time to realise that is so true O_0 If you not agree with what I wrote, feel free to explain why and stay respectfull.

*hugh i want to smoke a bit*
.


Tus Ojo-Belanova: Muse
Still the same mood I send two article tonight XD :Mood
Wops i changed place *_* I'm in front of the T.v in the living room : Where


# Posté le dimanche 29 mars 2009 02:28

Modifié le dimanche 29 mars 2009 04:32

✩☆First Step for friendship☆✩

Dig if u will the picture
Of u and I engaged in a kiss
The sweat of your body covers me
Can u my darling
Can u picture this?

So... this is My space:

★☆Oy!☆★

Tease.Cockblocker.Loud-mouthed bitch when I wanted.
But thats ok ill grow up someday.
25% Irish.25%weirdd.50%amazingg.
Names Maxu
Ask me how i got that name.
I look like an asian name.

THATS WHY. Im a dope ass person and i like to TRY and talk ghetto.
DOESNT WORK.
MAX-U;

I want to throw my hands up and let it go
Heres what ive discoverd;
Just because somebody flirts with you
doesnt mean they like you
Just because someone likes you doesnt mean they
want to go out with you
Just because someone goes out with you doesnt mean they
love you
Just because someone loves you doesnt mean they dont want to
hurt you
Because people lie, things change.
Boyfriends/ girlfriends cheat,bestfriends ditch.
And there will always be those people that would
kill to see you fall.
but thats ok youll grow up someday.
Dont let society rule who you are
and who you dont want to be.
Be a prep.Be a scene kid. Or just be yourself.
No one will care because there trying to
find themselves too.
Love like theres no tomorrow.
Because there might not be
The only thing guarenteed is death and taxes.

I'm a open minded person, so you can talk philosophy with me.
I believe in surnatural, but not wicked stuff.
I Drink
I use to smoke ... * see all folks smoke in my face so i get my eye twitching*
I take some light drug with my bro.
I love technology
Fashion& decoration
Gothic lolita, the style of emo girls and original person!
These days it seem am attracted by cyber-punk and their music it wicked. Anyway, if you the kinda person who love to go OUT and listen techno Rave music is great!
I love pierced lips, it make me fucking going crazy, I love so much to feel my lips to feel this pleasure.Its orgasmic *_*

I'm a LOUNGE person. I love to chillout and drink a martiny. Meanwhile, i can listen you kind of music, I love finding new beats like hip hop.
i'm a lunatic and daydreamer person.
Most of the time, people doesn't understand me, because for them, I'm a freak. Am been juge and my mother is part of it.
I got my fears and I'm brave enough to face each day people who think they got their nose touching the roof.

I'm very simple person.
I do not talk much but I'm a good listener.
I love cooking and making new stuff
I Love to go out and have fun.
I'm pervert and like to flirt until I embarrassing you.

Oy,
My name is Maxu
♥♡♥


sexy bitch- david guetta & akon :Muse
Chillout :Mood
Lying on my bed: Where[/c




✩☆First Step for friendship☆✩

# Posté le dimanche 29 mars 2009 00:51

Modifié le lundi 21 septembre 2009 10:38